10 Tips on Being a Modern Gentleman

This article is an introduction to being a real modern gentleman. Some men might associate the term “gentleman” with a thing of the past, but that’s not true.

The term “gentleman”, although it has a history of hundreds of years, is associated today with 19^th century men who, in our opinion, followed some etiquette rules without necessarily believing in them.

Also, gentlemen are usually seen in some connection with women. But we believe that’s not the case anymore. Being a good man is just that! The rules of politeness apply to everyone: men, women, young or old!

Being appropriate is more of an attitude thing than a blind belief in rules you don’t like or don’t agree with.

So, here are some rules you might want to consider. Some are plain and simple and can improve your life and others can be used when you just don’t know what to do. So, here we go:

1. Always make sure you are as clean as you can get! If you are on the run all day long, use a deodorant that lasts more (try one that athletes use, seriously)!
2. Respect other people. When you don’t like someone or don’t agree with them, say nothing or just say “I hear what you say, but don’t agree with you! Let’s just agree to disagree.”
3. Beware of the people you are with. We’re not saying you should not swear if you are the swearing kind, but try not to swear around people who you just know will be highly offended by it.
4. Don’t be too polite. There was once a joke: A guy tells his dad: “Today, 7 friends and I helped a woman cross the street.” “Well, why were all eight of you necessary?” asked the father, to which the boy replied: “Well, she didn’t want to cross the street.” If someone says they can handle something you offered to help with, and they refuse, ask again and then just leave them alone! This is also a cultural thing, so we can’t give a general rule. For example, in Korea you are supposed to refuse 4 times when someone offers you more food when you are invited at them, before you accept it.
5. When someone is talking, shut up. Just like that!
6. Always be punctual and try not to cancel your appointments! Unless you have a good reason, there is no excuse!
7. When making an appointment, always make sure you got it right and that the other person got it right! It’s really bad if someone calls you while you are watching TV asking where you are and you need to say “well, I thought we were supposed to meet next week”.
8. Always greet the people you meet. That goes without say!
9. Know when to leave. If you are meeting someone who you know more or less, it’s important to know how much time will be spending together. If things go really well and you are sure that the other person also feels like that, you can elongate your stay. You can establish these things when you establish the meeting: just ask “how much time do you have for me?” We’re sure the other person will be happy to answer.
10. Last, but not least, all those things we don’t even need to say, like fighting in public (not that fighting at home is OK), knowing how to lose, and speaking with your mouth full!

In our opinion, there’s always room for chivalry, which, if you spread it, will not disappear any time soon.

Further reading:

Street etiquette any man must know

Fraquoh and Franchomme

P.S. What do you think of chivalry? Is there still a need for men to treat women a certain way?