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A Debate: Children’s Clothes, Ads And Roles

Nowadays people often discuss whether kids should wear designer clothes or be stylish in general. We want to look into this controversy, look at both sides and draw some conclusions. Is it a true thing or just a made up issue?

First of all, we need to remember that it wasn’t until the 18th century when kids started wearing clothes which were designed for them. Before that, they used to wear grown-up’s clothes, just that in smaller sizes. If you think about it, in those days there wasn’t much style for the common person either, so this wasn’t such a drama as we see it today. However, after children started wearing clothes, the fashion industry took off as well for grown-ups. The 19th century was a period when children used to wear casual clothes if they were part of an average family, but children coming from rich families used to wear really beautifully designed, yet uncomfortable clothes. We can’t help but wonder if this built up in a frustration that later on led to the WW1 and WW2? It might sound strange, but the children who needed to “be seen, but not heard” were the grown ups who fought WW1.

After the 20th century started, and democracy rose in all sort of fields, fashion houses designed more and more clothes for kids. But, it seems that they have somehow forgotten the target they are designing for. Many designers and stores offer today kid’s clothes that look like grown-ups’ clothes, just that smaller.

The thing we need to look at when we look at these clothes is their meaning. We once wrote an article on masculinity and femininity and how the clothes your wear reflect the place you hold and your role. That is exactly the case here: why do kids dress like adults?

The problem with kids being dressed like adults is not so much a problem which resembles the 19th century kids’ clothes problem, as society and mentalities have changed, but it is that first of all, children are supposed to act like grown-ups and are treated as such, and secondly, it’s their parents idea to dress them up like that.

In photographs that advertise for children’s clothes, their roles are being assigned: if you want to have a smart kid, you should dress him like this, if you want a sporty kid, you should dress him like that. Clothing are symbols. The aspirations of the parents can often be contradictory with the reality of their children’s personalities: a kid that is always dressed up “business” might grow up to become a handy mechanic and so, the conflict the parents will feel will we interior and powerful, and in most cases, they won’t be able to put their finger on it.

Another thing we learn from kid’s advertising is how parents indirectly show their children the way they should act. Boys are always portrayed in active positions, jumping, running, kicking and so on, while girls are presented in passive positions and they can be described using passive verbs such as looking, sitting, having tea, etc.

 

 

The girl is sitting in a passive tone, while the big boy stands in the center as the patriarch. The small boy, with the non-mainstream conventional “hot” look is the funny one, who wears brighter colors and is not to be taken too seriously. The boys are separate from the girls. The big girl is holding the small girl, passing on the idea that girls need to “stay”, while the small boy is merely attached to the big one.

 

 

These are the arguments why it shouldn’t be appropriate to dress up kids as if they were dolls. Of course, needless to say that many clothes are, as a TV show once said “pimping” kids. It’s not even worth addressing the issues of parents dressing up their children in a way too grown-up way.

If we choose to look on the other side of the coin, it’s good to teach your kids taste and not to be sloppy. A child that dresses up every day in a t-shirt and sweatpants won’t get used to wearing a suit if he isn’t taught to or has a will or inclination to it. This is why it would be recommended to dress up children at occasions, and let them play dress-up as often as they want. In a cheesy US TV series, a little boy wanted to dress up as a fairy princess. His father refused that and dressed him like he wanted. At the end of the episode, the father was dressed as a fairy too, being in tandem with his kid’s Halloween costume, stating that “I can force him to dress a certain way for me, but it’s not gonna change who he is on the inside”. And he was right. Forcing children to become someone by dressing them a certain way won’t make them that.

Kids have their own rhythms. Yes, we should dress up our kids nicely and educate them, but forcing them to adopt a life that is not theirs will only lead to conflict. Your kid will let you know if and when he wants to dress up as a business man or fairy princess. People will be who they are and if we don’t let them be who they are, only conflict will rise and pain will come out, so this is why everyone should know the tools and use them to create their own style.

 

Fraquoh and Franchomme

 

 

 

 

 

P.S. What do you think? Should kids be all dressed-up? Will the clothes a child is wearing influence him later? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

 

 

8 replies on “A Debate: Children’s Clothes, Ads And Roles”

There’s a research paper that can be made out of this. Thank you for writing this, it’s a thought provoking issue I haven’t considered in a while.

I remember as a kid I wore pretty much what I wanted. I had a girly girl phase with demin minis, pretty blouses and shoes, then I was a tomboy at what point. Right now in university (and out of school uniforms!) I’m experimenting with my style. I don’t think forcing a kid to wear a certain attire would steer him toward a certain personality, but rather, it would drive him away from the persona the clothes project. I notice when parents forcibly dress their kids it’s often in response to something; frilly dresses for girls for instance if they think she’s too tomboyish, or nicer clothes for boys who are constantly getting dirty in order to get them to stay indoors a little longer. It’s not fixed though.

I think it’s important for children to have some guidance in what clothes to wear, how to put together a good outfit etc as it will stand them in good stead later in life. But I also think it’s important to let your child choose his/her own clothes. So when you go shopping with your child i think you should let them pick some stuff that they like and pick stuff that you like too, and give them time to wear what they want to wear a few days of the week or something and enforce guidelines when it matters like a formal dinner or a wedding. That way they also learn that they can be who they are, but sometimes they might have to conform and it doesn’t have to be awful because they can still know who they are, even if they are wearing a suit or a frilly dress

Haha, many times I’ve thought about writing a post like this, but I always decide against it because my blog is a purely personal style blog. I think I’ll eventually add opinion posts, but not for now.

I like your take on the issue. I must admit I have a very specific reaction when I see kids dressed in stuffy designer clothing. It looks so restrictive. I like to think I would dress my kids the way my kids would like to be dressed. Of course, I would not let them look sloppy or walk around naked to places. But I would always want to encourage them to choose clothing for themselves, as I believe (and research probably shows, I bet), that doing so helps to build a child’s self-esteem and confidence in themselves. For formal events, like weddings, for example, I would probably want to dress my child like a cute little adult. But for every other day I’d want them to enjoy what is developmentally appropriate for their age, without cultivating in them a need to look dapper all the time.

Thank you for your ifb message. I’m glad I read it and came over. Your blog is very interesting.

-Nathy

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